Phat to Fabulous!

31 March 2006

Did you just step on my fucking Timbs?

So I recently got my first pair of Timberlands since college. I figured I needed something other than tennis shoes to wear on days when I have on jeans and stuff. They are pretty versatile and pretty comfy, however today I think they took over my body and I turned into someone else! You know I never really understood the black man's willingness to go to blows over a pair of boots. Seriously, you know what I am talking about. Two dudes are in a club one bumps the other and just barely scuffs the toe of the others sacred Timbs and what happens? a) Mr. Scuffed says, "Oh no worries accidents happen, have a splendid evening." b) Mr. Scuffer stops in his tracks and says, "Oh my brother, my bad, sorry about that let me buff that with my foot locker eraser for you." c) Mr. Scuffed gets his panties in a bunch and threatens to shoot up the whole damn spot, because this muthafucka scuffed his damn Timbs! If you live in Milwaukee you know quickly that the correct response is c! So if you answered "c," you are correct! *Ding Ding Ding Ding* Bob tell 'em what they win? Uh yeah nothing, we don't have that kind of budget around here peeps, just give yourself a good old pat on the back! Anyway, I wore my Timbs to work today, it was casual Friday, kind of, well that's questionable, but that's a discussion for another day. So I am on my way to the bathroom at work and this chick comes barreling into the aisle right into me and does what? SHE SCUFFED MY TIMBS! For a moment, I stopped and in my mind I played out the options I had for my reaction to this situation. I figured that running to the parking garage and getting my piece out of the trunk and coming back and shooting everybody up in the place probably wasn't an option. There's a few problems with that, I don't have said piece, I am pretty sure that would get me fired, do you know how long it takes to get to the parking garage, and I don't want to go to prison and become anyone's bitch! So I had hold all the ghetto-ness that was trying to pop up out of my chest and say politely, "Oh don't worry about it, not a problem." In my head I am thinking BITCH YOU SCUFFED MY TIMBS! I have gotten similarly close to this kind of passion about my snake skin stilletos before, but never quite like this. Brothas, I now understand you fury. Keep hope for clean Timbs alive!


One battle at a time...
So I have made it through yet another week of dragging my butt to the gym. 6 days, now I get my 2 days off! I am kind of disappointed in myself, because after all of that work, I ate a few things I really shouldn't have, however most of the week I was really good. I had gone to Sam's Club and stocked up on bottle water and 100-calorie pack snacks to keep at work and stocked up on fruits and veggies for lunches and dinner. Hopefully, my indiscretions won't completely throw me off track. 4 months and 3 days until Caribana!

*singing* Duh duh duh duh dom...good night sweetheart well its time to go...
It is past my bed time. I need to hit the sack and get in the bed. Thing 1 has ballet in the morning and I am sure Thing 2 will keep me very busy. Have a great weekend folks. Holla at your girl!

Today's Quote:
No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office.
~George Bernard Shaw
posted by Elle Jefe at 3/31/2006 09:22:00 PM

9 Comments:

informant - you took the words right out of my mouth! you know the other thing that always tripped me out is the dude, you know him, driving his Escalade sitting on 26' Dubs pulling into the driveway at his mama's house, because he rents a bed in the basement. Oh hell to the naw!

4/03/2006 10:12 AM  

hey, how are those 100-calorie snack packs?!?!? i've been dying to try them, but keep putting it off.

4/03/2006 11:54 AM  

the 100-calorie packs are a lot better than I thought they would be. I am a choco-holic and these give me a sufficient chocolate fix. The only bad thing is you don't get to sing the song about what's inside the oreo cookies, because it is really just the wafers! :)

4/03/2006 12:10 PM  

ha ha!!! hey, im TAGGING you!!!!!!

4/03/2006 12:33 PM  

Haha...my boyfriend shits a shingle if I happen to step on his Jordans!

I believe "Things 1 & 2" are in reference to your babies? And if so I think that is quite hilarious.

4/03/2006 1:20 PM  

I can't buy Timbs anymore because I had two scuffed before and I was ready to rumble too.

However, of all shoes, Timbs, especially the light-colored ones should not be worn in clubs.

4/03/2006 2:14 PM  

theidlereceptionist - we won't even begin to talk about my husband and his infatuation with shoes. he thinks because my daughters name is jordan that she must own every pair, but he doesn't want her to wear them anywhere because she will get them dirty, yet he won't let me buy her the cheap kim-possible ones that she likes at target! uh hello what do you want the child to go barefoot?

oh wise professor - see there is a strange passion about a black man and his timbs. and hells no they should not be worn in the club. half the clubs in milwaukee won't let people in wearing timbs anymore, this is probably the main reason!

4/03/2006 2:29 PM  

So, let me get this straight. You are basically saying that you've nearly been having N***** moments, is that right? Now you know how that usually turns out. Senior Love Daddy says, "Chill, Chill."

Maybe it's JUST Timbs, because I have a pair of Rockports thats all kind of bust up, that I wear to work (and did so when I bought them). Come to think of it, that's where they got all busted up. Anyway, I never had that reaction. Rude people stepping on your shoes, yes, but no noticably reaction. Weird.

(my apologies if this came out twice)

4/04/2006 4:02 PM  

Miss A - you stink for tagging me! lol I hav been in training all day today, I will get it done.

Rodney - It is only the timbs. And I have been around folks long enough to know when and when not to pull out the ghetto card. I'll be aiight! (it only came through once)

4/04/2006 10:00 PM  

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