Phat to Fabulous!
22 March 2006
Let's see if the computer Gods are behaving today!
So I have been missing in action lately, because between blogger and my own server I think they were trying to keep me from y'all. So since its been a minute lets just get down and dirty, aiight!
Someone didn't get the memo...
So apparently, there are still a few people in the world, more specifically in Milwaukee, even more specifically, that work in my building that did not get my memo from a few months ago. As I entered work yesterday, I saw yet another victim of the white pants horror. However, this one may have had the first girl beat, I kid you not. This broad, yes I use the word broad, had on white jeans, not sure if they were dirty or it they were possibly off white, in either case they were still very wrong! The were tapered and flooding like Michael Jackson in Thriller. But it didn't stop there, oh now, she must have been in the partying mood when she got up this morning, because to go with her white jeans, which speaking of I didn't think jeans of any color were part of a business casual dress code, anyway, she had on a bolero white jean jacket, slight less dingy/off-white colored. To top of the look to make sure that we didn't forget the good ol' days of 1986, she had a she-mullet! Don't play like you don't know what I am talking about. It's a mullet, but it is on is on a broad, and doesn't look any better than when it was on a dude! I 'bout died! She was serious. Poor thing, I considered dropping everything I had in my possession at the time and running over like Stacy and Clinton do on "What Not To Wear," and just screaming INTERVENTION! She is in desperate need of one.
Someone didn't get the memo...
So apparently, there are still a few people in the world, more specifically in Milwaukee, even more specifically, that work in my building that did not get my memo from a few months ago. As I entered work yesterday, I saw yet another victim of the white pants horror. However, this one may have had the first girl beat, I kid you not. This broad, yes I use the word broad, had on white jeans, not sure if they were dirty or it they were possibly off white, in either case they were still very wrong! The were tapered and flooding like Michael Jackson in Thriller. But it didn't stop there, oh now, she must have been in the partying mood when she got up this morning, because to go with her white jeans, which speaking of I didn't think jeans of any color were part of a business casual dress code, anyway, she had on a bolero white jean jacket, slight less dingy/off-white colored. To top of the look to make sure that we didn't forget the good ol' days of 1986, she had a she-mullet! Don't play like you don't know what I am talking about. It's a mullet, but it is on is on a broad, and doesn't look any better than when it was on a dude! I 'bout died! She was serious. Poor thing, I considered dropping everything I had in my possession at the time and running over like Stacy and Clinton do on "What Not To Wear," and just screaming INTERVENTION! She is in desperate need of one.
Did you ever wonder?
Why do you take the stem off of the apple before you eat it? Its not like you are going to eat that part of the apple anyway. Unless you are Kennedy, that child eats everything. And whenever I try to take it off it never completely breaks off, there is always that little piece that is too short to really reach with your fingers that just ends up staying there. Does it make the apple taste better? Is it toxic and if you don't take it off there is a chance your unborn child will have one eyeball in the middle of its forehead? Ok, maybe not, but who was the first person to say, "Wait, don't be ridiculous you can't eat that apple like that, you must take the stem off!" What did the stem ever do to anybody really.
Glass House Count!
Today there were 3 people in the glass house of death when I came into work this morning. What a great way to start your day then to kill yourself in the morning sunshine! Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!
Call Madea, 866-766-2332!
If you haven't already called this number try it. You can call Madea. It might ring for a while, but it will pick up finally. and try not to laugh to hard when you are at work, I don't need y'all gettin' fi-red. OK, Thank Yur! LMAO! (Thanks Teneqwa!)
So last night I made it to the gym...
And apparently so did everyone else in the freaking city of Milwaukee! The parking lot at the gym was poppin' off like the parking lot of the Empire Room back in the day! (Some of y'all don't know nothing 'bout that, but let's just put it this way, if there had been a few more booming systems, cars with hydraulics and people shooting at each other I might have had to go put on my dancing shoes! lol) I pull in the drive way, and as soon as I turn down the side of the building I see this child backing up, so I back up to let her out, thinking maybe she is trying to park in the front of the building. Nope, she was just confused. After backing up she decided to do what, but put her car in drive and go right back to where she just came from! WTF! She proceeded to do this a good 3 or 4 more times, making me test my abilities not to curse with the babies in the car. So I get a parking spot and apparently it was like Madea's family reunion up in there. Mel was there, Nicole and Corey were both there with Aniah. I get completely dressed and I realize I am still wearing my prescription sunglasses and my regular glasses are still in the car. Mel convinces me that I should just workout without them, however y'all need to understand how blind I really am! If you are standing 5 feet away from me and I don't have my glasses on I cannot make out anything on face as much more than shadows. I warned her and Nicole that if I worked out without glasses they may be leading me around like Stevie Wonder. They assisted me in scoping out a treadmill. What great friends they are! Nicole ended up on one 2 away from me. NOTE TO NICOLE: If I have on no glasses and you want to show me something from 2 treadmills away, don't try to mouth out what you want to tell me! I can barely see your face let alone identify which part of it is your mouth and what it is trying to tell me. Either walk over to tell me or wait until we are done, because I am going to just nod and smile and pretend like I know what you said and then ask you again later! I did 40 minutes on the treadmill, I was going to split it up and do 20 minutes at the beginning and the end of my workout, however with the number of people in there last night, I was concerned that if I got off of the treadmill, I might not be able to find one when I got done with everything else. So I just started that baby right back up and did another 20 minutes. It wasn't so bad. It definitely could have been way worse. After I got off the treadmill, I decided to break down and go get my glasses, because I couldn't handle not being able to see! After that I finished off my workout and took my sweaty stinky butt home! All in all it was a pretty good workout.
My skin issues continue...
So apparently my skin got worse it stings and itches and I am just trying not to touch it, but it is becoming very difficult. Ahhhhhh, I hate this!
*singing* I always feel like somebody's watching meeeeeeeeee...
Links...
- Join the 2006 SELF Challenge today! I did!
- Not sure if you saw this, but it is an interview with the girlfriend of American Idol's Ace, Essence Atkins! If you don't know Essence she is Half of the UPN Show Half and Half!
- Take this test to see just how Southern you are...I was 70% Dixie (Just south of the Mason Dixon Line!) I knew I didn't belong in Wisconsin! CLICK HERE
Until next time peeps, I'm out!
Today's Quote:
You know it's time to diet when you push away from the table and the table moves.
~Quoted in The Cockle Bur
2 Comments:
You're supposed to twist the stem off and for each twist, recite a letter of the alphabet. Whatever letter you land on when the stem snaps off is the first letter of your future man's name, silly goose!
Hey Idle - Maybe that's why mine always break off so quick because my husband's name starts with a 'C'! LOL
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